sick. i dont think ill be doing that very often, if ever, again.
but besides that i feel good. i feel happy. i feel satisfied.
i know what i have to do and i kept losing focus but i am not going to lose focus anymore. i have to stop letting myself get in the way of the things that are what matter and what need to be done and said.
it may mean sacrifice but ill just have to be okay with that because in the end it will be less sacrifice until someday it will mean no sacrifice at all.
or that could all be mixed up and it will eventually mean sacrificing everything.
but as i said. i just have to do it and find out and stop hoping for things so much.
stop stressing, start focusing.
thats what my tampon told me this morning.
it seemed accurate enough.
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(dying is an art. like everything else. i do it exceptionally well. i do it so it feels like hell. i do it so it feels real. i guess you could say i've a call)
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